The Weak-End

Once upon a time there was a girl who had a dream. This dream was of depth with God, knowledge, opportunity, and a life far away. Of course this dream was filled with pictures and plans of what the future would bring. And like most dreams, when matched with reality one of the pictures paled. Expectations would say reality always pales in comparison to the dream. Yet in the case that I bring before you, the opposite is beyond true. My dream has quickly paled in comparison to my reality. I sit here in the evening cool of San Jose, surrounded by the coolest people on earth, preparing for a Bible study tonight, and knowing that the language I have a strong passion for is slowly becoming second nature in my mind. What more could I ask for? How blessed am I to even be here! God is good, all the time. 

Alright, now to dive into the craziness I call life here in CR. This week we began our regular schedule of Spanish classes: 4 hours every morning. But instead of having our regular schedule of Bible classes in the afternoon, we went to the Timothy and Barnabas conference that SCORE puts on every year. Which means instead of having 2 hours of Bible, we had close to 8. Wow. Talk about brain dead by the time it hits 10 o'clock. But no, the fun doesn't stop there. In the evening I would still read the daily Bible reading with my friends and THEN I would head to my room at lock-up. As I drag myself into my bed and grab my journal, before I let my head flop down on the pillow I decide that I'm not crazy enough yet.. so I set my alarm for 5:45 am. WHAT?!? Yes. I get up to run at 6 in the morning. True Starrett flows through my veins. Although the morning is early and painful, it's definitely my favorite part of the day. The reason I get up so early is to be absolutely sure I have as much time as I want with the First Love of my heart before the day actually starts. By running, I'm awake. By eating breakfast, I'm not distracted. Which leaves my heart and mind in the perfect state to come before the Lord of the universe, fall at his feet, and enjoy his presence while requesting his help in a week as physically, mentally, and spiritually straining as this one. 

The message that made the most impact on my life this week was from Joshua 1:1-9. Four times in this passage the Lord tells Joshua to “be strong and courageous.” And when God repeats himself, I'm pretty sure he means business. Be strong and courageous. In this passage 'strong' means the power to resist temptation, and 'courageous' means in temptation having the ability to serve, or complete God's task. Because if we've been given a task by God, there will be opposition, in which case strength and courage are necessary. But don't worry it doesn't stop there. We are also promised that strength and courage are possible through knowing the promises of God. He gives us provision, protection, and prosperity. Banking on these promises we are able to face any task he assigns us with strength and courage. He also promises his presence wherever and whenever we are faced with anything. We have an overwhelming task, but an overpowering God!! This is just a summation of the message, you'll have to go read Joshua 1 to get the full story. But it really stuck out to me that I need to be fully relying on God for my strength in every situation because it is so necessary for effective ministry. I can't just halfheartedly serve because I'm scared of opposition or failure. Joshua was left with the entire Israelite nation following him, young, inexperienced, and not ready at all for what was coming. But God didn't tell him, “Don't worry it'll be easy” or “You don't have to do it if you don't want to.” No way! God gave him a task and told him to be strong and courageous. He made sure to make it clear that he would never be alone in the task, but he also required Joshua to give his all. That's what he requires of me too. Not just the part of me that's not scared, or the part of me that's sure I can be successful, but all of me. Every last terrified, unsure, wandering piece of my heart. I'm giving it all to God. No more of this weak minded partially committed because I don't know what will happen. It's all up to the One who's in control. So now as Saturday morning dawns, it's not only the weekend, it's the weak-end. Through my Savior, I am strong and courageous.