Loving the Mob

7/31/10

I woke up smiling this morning, very early, because all the Haitian’s cell phones were ringing. It’s so funny that they live up here on Grenier, don’t have running water or stable electricity, but all have cell phones. Our massive slumber party was broken down and put away so that we would have room for VBS later today. For the most part, despite the storm and craziness of last night, everyone slept fairly well. I still can’t completely comprehend let alone capture on paper just what happened.. I just take a deep breath, let it out, and say “Wow, God is so good to us!” We had egg sandwiches again for breakfast today, delicious! And then as we were slipping and sliding everywhere on the treacherously wet mountain side, we set up for a day of VBS. The ground was nearly impossible to walk on without slipping, even the Haitians had trouble, but I managed without killing myself. Kesnel said there weren’t going to be as many kids as originally predicted because of the slick conditions of the mountain. It turned out he was right; we only had 240ish instead of the possible 400!! But still, with that many kids, they were literally everywhere. Packed into the church, staring in at the doors, wandering around the field, all curious and wanting to see what was going to happen. It took about an hour just to get the kids sorted into age groups, but once that was done groups of about 50 kids went from station to station with only one leader. First they came to me at music. Wow, my Lord really really sent his strength to me. I’ve mentioned before my fear of not knowing the language and being thrown in to lead music to kids that I can barely communicate with, so let me tell you how it all played out. One blessing was I was not alone, my mom played with me, so I at least had another presence to be stared at along with myself. But I also had some translators. I didn’t expect this, just because I figured each group leader would take a translator before I got one at music, but with the fact that the translators had major crushes on me, they stuck around at the music station to help me out. In this case, I was incredibly thankful that they were around, because the usual banter and introduction and transition talking that I would instigate in English disappeared. I had nothing to say. I had nothing I could say. It was so weird and very scary and very hard. But because Joe was around, he spoke for me. The super cool thing was, he was amazing when it came to talking to the kids, getting them excited about singing, and choosing a song he knew I would know. Because of his intercession I could lead songs the kids would recognize in English, and even got to learn a few kids songs in Creole. God worked it out absolutely perfectly. I was astonished, grateful, and incredibly relieved. I know that all you back home praying for me and my fear of the language barrier as I stepped into this leadership role was the cause of this amazing day. I can’t be more thankful for God’s goodness and all your prayers. They have gone far and been a fabulous blessing. After music the kids moved on to lesson time where they listened to Kesnel. He gave the Gospel in a bold, simple, and clear fashion that kept their attention. This was the whole reason we had called all these kids to come from all over the mountain, to hear the Word of God taught. So remember the children of Grenier Mountain in your prayers as the seeds have been planted and now need water. Then came game time and face painting which was really fun, but with the number of kids, absolute chaos. The toys that came out led leaders to be mobbed over the excitement. However, just playing with the kids was an amazing experience to be sure. The next station was crafts where they got to decorate bags and get crayons, stickers, and coloring books to fill them. Of course the stickers ended up all over their faces as well as the bags. When all the groups made it through all the stations, we brought half of the kids into the church at a time to feed them. We gave them bread and fish (how suitable for the situation huh?) and kool-aid. Some of these kids walk over two hours to get to the church and eat only one meal a day, so it was a big blessing to be able to give them something to eat before sending them home. Before they left we prayed over them. David prayed with Joe translating and we all stood in front of the group of kids and stretched our hands out over them to bless their departure. It felt like a physical way could give these kids the love of God that they needed so much. It was heart wrenching as we watched them all leave just hoping that the seed was planted deep enough in their heart, and that we showed them true love coming straight from the Lord. After the kids were off to their own homes, the rest of the day was plan-less and wonderful. We ate some, relaxed, and laughed a lot for about an hour. Then it started to rain pretty hard so we ran to the church and just talked and eventually ate dinner. As the time goes on these down-time moments cause me to fall in love with every single member of my team. Through rain or shine (literally) we come together and smile in the midst of chaos. God could not have put more perfect people in each role to create a wonderful working body of believers that are now called my family. By the time we finished dinner the sun came back out and we could resume our blissful wandering. Some of us girls got to paint the nails of a lot of the ladies who were staying with us and cooking for us. They loved it. The smiles on their faces were priceless as we gave them the bottles to keep so they could redo them anytime later. I found a spot on the side of the mountain to read my Bible before another massive monsoon blew in and we had to bunker down again. It’s almost frustrating how religiously the rain comes around here. Because of the strong winds we have to literally hold down our tents, causing everyone to be out in the storm, getting soaked to the bone and freezing. By the time we can get to any kind of suitable cover anything that’s dry is now wet because it’s being used to keep us warm. It’s just crazy. I definitely won’t be the same when I get back. My emotions have run the gamut, and my heart has been stretched to what feels like its max. I never knew I could love or be loved so much by people I don’t even know. And on top of all that God has molded and changed me in ways that I never expected or knew possible. He has shown me a side of his love that I have never truly grasped. I thank Him over and over for allowing me to be a part of this even in the middle of the hardship. It’s more than a blessing in disguise.

Ministry Reversal

7/30/10

The night and morning were about the same as before, crazy and early. But this morning we got pancakes! Yes, real pancakes. The Roos’s brought the mix, because the Haitians hadn’t ever seen or heard of pancakes before. They had some trouble with the pans and ended up using only some of the mix so each of us only got half a pancake. They were delicious and rare. Then another day in the Grenier clinic began. Today was a little slower, we saw 161 people and ended early when the line died down, but that’s still an incredible number! It totals to a number of 389.. Wow, praise God!! We cleaned up and organized most of the medicine left over, logged the papers away, and gave out the last of the hygiene kits before having the same dinner of rice and beans again. Little did we realize that after dinner would hold an experience none of us would have ever dreamed possible. The clouds descended from the top of the mountain just like they had every day, but this time they were especially black and menacing. The winds came harder than they had ever previously and the rain hit like I’ve never seen before. Most of us ran into the church for cover, but our men and many of the Haitians ran up to our camp in the middle of the storm in order to save our stuff. They came carrying down our luggage in garbage bags along with anything we needed for the night. Then they had to stand up on the side of the mountain and physically hold our tents from blowing down the mountain in the monsoon. Those of us in the church were constantly praying for our family out there.. although Tanya did decide to wash her hair from the church door in the rain. Because of how scary and how hard the storm was, we really needed God’s arms to wrap around and hold us onto the mountain. Eventually the winds died down enough for everyone to come back into the church, but the rains were still so terrible that we decided that it would be better to just all sleep in the church. When the guys came in they were shivering so badly, especially the Haitians not used to the cold of the rain (they even said there was hail at one point), we had to grab all the sheets, towels, and shirts that we could find to wrap them up and keep them as warm as possible. By God’s sovereignty alone were we fortunate enough to have brought in our towels that day to hang up to dry, the Roos’s had brought their clothes into the church to keep the water off, and we had chosen sheets instead of tarps for the medical clinic dividers. So because of all these random things that happened to work perfectly together, we had sheets, shirts, and towels to warm up these freezing men. God is so good! So far this whole week we had been ministered to over and over by these people of Grenier Mountain. This was our chance to minister back. We gave them our clothes, our food, and literally joined beside them for the night. What a picture of Christ’s love! It was such a blessing to be able to be the arms and heart of our very Lord to these people. I got out my guitar and two different cultures, languages, and church bodies joined together to worship the name of Christ in the midst of a massive monsoon. For the next few hours we set up mattresses and prepared the church for a huge slumber party. It’s slightly chaotic, but totally cool. And of course since the storm started around 5 we were stuck in the church from then until bedtime so we had many hours to kill. I of course practiced my ethnomusicology and played music with the Haitians. I learned more Creole, some of their life stories, and taught them one of my favorite songs in English. Eventually it was close enough to night for us to be tired and try for some sleep. God had certainly given us a day we will never forget for the rest of our lives. It was incredible to say the least. I wound down the day by reading my Bible and writing in my journal. It was almost hard to write about today because of how emotionally packed it was. Talk about a missions extraordinaire.

God Sent Success Exceeding Expectations

7/29/10

Mm what a night.. You’d think Haiti would be hot, but last night was actually cold. There was a massive wind storm that kept us up a little and even blew our tents over partially. Thankfully we have awesome people taking care of us who nailed in some new stakes and we survived. And I made it through the cold by snuggling up to my little sister space heater. Then as the sun rose around 5 it became hard to sleep so I woke up and got ready for the day. Our shower/bathroom is a bamboo structure with tarps as the walls. There are big rocks for the flooring and the toilet is a bottom-less 5 gallon bucket with a “luggable loo” seat top. He became our best friend. The shower half is just rocks for the flooring as well and a bucket of water used to wash off. It’s quite the camping experience. Usually we have someone stand guard as we take showers or wear a swimsuit because the Haitians really enjoy just watching us as we’re in our camp. We had plenty of time to sit around, chat, do our morning devotions, and drink coffee because the sun came up at 5, but we didn’t have breakfast til 8. This, as our first morning on the mountain, they decided to provide a very Haitian breakfast.. spaghetti.. but not spaghetti with sauce, spaghetti with ketchup. For breakfast!! It was really good, but so weird still. Then after breakfast we circled up and prayed for the coming clinic. Today and tomorrow we would hold the clinic from 9-12, then break for lunch, then more clinic from 1-4. So we needed God to be with us! Each of us had jobs to fill. I worked in the outtake station. The people coming in started in a line outside the door of the church where a few guys were stationed as bouncers and only let a few people in at a time. Then they would get their blood pressure, temperature, age, and problem taken and written down at the intake station. They would then, based on their problem, either go straight to the pharmacy or wait for the nurse. Angel and Hannah were our two nurses, and my mom ran the pharmacy. Everyone who came through would get vitamins and a hygiene pack along with any medication they needed. There was a pastor who worked in the pharmacy to explain to everyone how to take their medicine. Then they would come to Sarah and me at outtake. We checked their number and paperwork to keep it filed for if they ever came back and a doctor needed to see what we had given them already. It was so neat to see all the people come in and be helped. Our expectation was to see around 60 people each day and just today we saw 228 people!!!! It was completely a God thing. I couldn’t believe it. Our Lord is absolutely amazing! I’m in awe every single second of the day because of how he’s working. It’s indescribable. Today when we were praying after the clinic many of us started crying because of how utterly thankful we are for the help of the natives, the support from our church back home, and God’s hand in it all. I can’t say enough how humbling and even breaking it is. Wow. Then the evening was interesting. I got to play my guitar with some of the Haitian guys and sing in both English and Creole, which was easily a major highlight. I was just playing and they asked me to sing too so I started singing “Lord I Lift Your Name on High” in English and they recognized it so they joined in with Creole, and I got to learn it. It was so cool and I was grinning the whole time. I mean, language, music, and praising God, what could sum my passion in life up better than that?! Then dinner rolled around: rice, beans, French fries, and fried bananas, again. But even having it every night it’s still delicious. Ruby and I watched the sunset together tonight just talking and enjoying the view. Over the mountains is absolutely gorgeous. Plus the clouds were rolling down from the top of the mountain like fog and it looked incredible. Of course it did rain again monsoon style: downpour for maybe an hour with major thunder and some lightning, then calm again as it got dark. God has blessed us and allowed most of our stuff to stay dry. I got to have some down time to play cards with Olivia, Jesse, and Jacob tonight. We played “President” which was new and interesting, but very fun even though I lost every time. Now I get to chill in the tent and chat with my little sister about all the Creole words we’re learning and the awesome people we get to hang out with all week. Morning comes fast around here, and I’ve got to be ready for clinic round two, so keep the prayers coming, God is surely working!!

The Burden He Lifted

7/28/10

The first morning in Haiti wasn’t quite as late coming as my tired body had hoped. We rose at 5:30 sharp and were off to Greneir Mountain by 6. The sun was already up and the many roosters crowing loudly. Thankfully the heat had not come.. yet. We packed up all our bags and loaded them onto one truck. This was the start of an incredible experience. In order for us to all fit on the truck, I perched on top right above the cab with Jacob, and everyone else piled into the back tightly. My dad and Kesnel even had to hold onto the sides and stand on the bumper. Now balancing was not the only issue; these things that Haitians call roads are far from paved. They’re more like cliffs of rock that you might be brave enough to ride a 4-wheeler down! I feared for my life and the uprightness of our truck more than a few times. But we all made it safely to the riverbed at the base of the mountain where the hike began. Now came the journey up. It’s not called a mountain for nothing. Strapped with my backpack and guitar, I started the very steep upward climb, yes, climb. The trail was made of mostly gravelish rock, and because of this it zig-zagged in order to be able to walk up at all. The heat of the day had struck and we were all dripping with sweat, pleading for the top to come, and staring in wonder as Haitian children carried our nearly 50 pound bags on their heads up the mountain that we could barely get ourselves up. This was when I received a very vivid picture of the burden of sin that I carried before my Savior removed it for me. It weighed me down so much and tired me out so quickly that all I wished for was for it to be gone. Climbing in such a sinful nation with that burden, it reminded me of how absolutely thankful I am that I am no longer stumbling through life with such a cumbersome weight. It hit me that I need to not only spread the Gospel, but let it affect my own life every day as well. God is so good, and I can’t say that enough. Once we made it to the top we scoped out where our clinic and camp would be set up. We had a breakfast of scrambled eggs and bread along with multiple bottles of water! Then the work began. We unloaded bags of medicine, pitched tents, cleared rocks, set up tarps, constructed our bathroom/shower house, and soon camp started to appear. Every time I looked up I caught my breath. The view here is absolutely incredible. Lots of the Haitian children especially were around to smile at us and help with the set-up. Sometimes it’s so hard because the kids will come up to me and start talking, but I can’t understand a single word. It’s heartbreaking. The whole day was filled with tasks of preparation; LOTS of sorting and portioning pills and vitamins for the medical clinic. But some of the school children helped out, and that was so fun. They would count in French with us as we divided bottles of vitamins into baggies. I am so excited to give out all the medication that we prepared today. It blows my mind how much we have, and yet it still breaks my heart that this is all we have to give… a month’s supply of simple medicine. The atmosphere here is so warm. The people are so very willing to help us and do all that they can to go out of their way to make us comfortable. It’s amazing how loving they are to people that they don’t know anything about. My deepest desire is that we can come close to loving them as much in return. During the down time we just hung out, talked, relaxed, gazed over Haiti from our mountain home, and just enjoyed being with the people. God once again proved his goodness by blessing us with the most perfect weather imaginable. It was overcast all day keeping the heat at a minimum, and it only rained once, but it was brief enough to keep our stuff dry. The whole day was just amazing and far exceeding any and all expectations. Our dinner was of course rice and beans along with French fries (I KNOW) and fried bananas. Proving once again how much these women care for us, they cut and cooked it all by hand, even sifting the rice for bugs (which did not happen at Lance’s house). It was delicious. The evening was very relaxing. I read my Bible on the side of the mountain with a view I wish you could see. I felt like I could see all of Haiti from where I sat.. plus God was right there with me telling me how much he loves these people. It was amazing to say the least. Showers were available from a 5 gallon bucket of water, which was extremely pleasant after sweating all day. Then just standing there watching the gorgeous sun sink behind the mountains to the west was another breathtaking moment. The weather quickly cooled off and even turned chilly as the night came. We had another passion filled worship session together that once again drew our hearts to the reason we’re all here, our Almighty God. Now I’m sitting under the amazingly beautiful stars writing in my journal. It is truly amazing, the hillside lit up, the millions of stars, and the knowledge of our great God. Wow. Remember that our God reigns!!

In the Midst of Chaos

7/27/10

As I set foot in the Port Au Prince airport it felt like I was slapped in the face by all of my senses at once. There was so much to take in coming at me from all sides. We were so blessed to have a connection because the immigration line was so long it’s indescribable, over three times as long as the security line in Chicago. But when we walked off the bus that crammed us all over to the make-shift airport (the original building was destroyed by the earthquake), we were met with Miami, one of the Roos’s friends who works there. Tired from flying and taking in all the chaos, I walked in a daze as we bypassed the long line and were at the baggage claim in 15 minutes or so. But the baggage claim was when the fun began. All 26 of our bags made it safely (PTL) and were loaded onto 6 carts. Pushing these carts empty was a challenge, let alone the fact that the ground was so uneven the carts got stuck and all the bags would fall off. On top of that people swarmed to help, of course demanding tip. So while constantly saying “no mesi” and even physically slapping arms away, I struggled to follow our people to a rough looking truck and a small battered van. Our bags piled up so high on the truck that I was sure it would topple even with the four guys holding them in place by sitting on them of course. Then all the rest of us plus some (17 total) crammed into a roughly 9-passenger van. All of course in over 100 degree weather and holding all of our carry-on luggage in our laps or wherever we could stuff it. The 15 mile trek took us over 3 hours because of a lost driver and unexplainable traffic. The entire ride was filled with emotions I only wish I could express. I could see trash and poverty stricken tent cities; I could smell the rank garbage and sewer water running through the streets as well as endless pouring sweat; I could hear the voices of many children clinging to the side of our moving van saying “one dollar one dollar”; I could feel the bumps in the torn up roads left a wreck by the earthquake; I could taste the density of the air in the heat… I was very far from home. It was unbelievable the sights along the road, and yet it was not all tragic. Many of these people were finding a new home and living happily. A few times the sights and people drew a smile. Such as when two girls hauled a bucket of water between themselves laughing the whole way. And even in the crowded van and stopped traffic, I was able to pull out my guitar and lead the hot, tired, cramped team in praise to God, who had sent us and gotten us safely thus far. Was that amazing.. Eventually we made it safely to the house where we were staying. Relaxation at last! We said hello to the Roos family and separated our bags that we needed for the night from those going up the mountain, then set up our make-shift sleeping area and chilled for a bit. Dinner was served and we had another time of worship. I am endlessly amazed at how awesome God is even in crazy situations like today. He showed himself faithful to us, and we praised his name. There’s no better way to end the day!

From Farewell to Fyling

A log of my Haiti trip for those who want to hear.

7/27/10

Day one began very early. Shortened sleep and rapid last-minute essentials thrown into our bags left us saying goodbye to our air conditioned house, running water, soft beds and electricity, and placing us in the midst of loving brothers and sisters in Christ to send us off at the prime time of 4:30 am. Despite the stress and nerves everyone had a smile accompanying their large bags. Standing in the moonlight it was almost surreal to be reminded of the fast approaching reality that we were soon to be very far from home in a whole new culture. After a very encouraging time of powerful prayer and an excited yet somber goodbye, all 13 team members and 26+ bags of gear packed into a truck and van to head out. This was it. The time had come; we were going to Haiti. The drive was no surprise, typical Chicago traffic and sights, and arriving on the curb of the packed airport we were greatly blessed already. A willing attendant took all of our passports at once and checked all of our bags. No hassle, no line, just God making our trip smooth. Of course we then enter the favored part of traveling - security. The line seemed especially long, but with the entertainment of each other it passed surprisingly quickly. Once through the gate we had but a short two hours until our flight to Miami. A convenient McDonald's breakfast and game of Euchre passed the time wonderfully. But now as I sit here staring out at the sky, I remember exactly where I'm going. Wow. How is it that I was chosen by God for this task? A wretched sinner being sent overseas on behalf of the Ruler of the universe. How privileged am I to say that I have the power of the Mighty God behind everything I say. An overwhelming humbling peace washes over me every time I think about the duty that I have been given. My nerves and fears remind me that I need a Savior, but the thought of the Haitian people pumps me up to the point that I can't help shouting about it from the top of Grenier Mountain!! The power of the cross fills my veins, and a smile erupts on my face at the thought of a holy God placing his words in my mouth and love in my heart. May I be strong enough to step aside and allow his power to do work in me. Honestly, I don't know all what to expect. It's monsoon season, the mosquitoes are bad, disease is all over, and the language is different. These are merely surface issues that will form this week into nothing I've ever experienced before. My mind races and I get goosebumps any time I think about all this week will hold. But with prayer behind us and God leading the way, I say bring it on!

Why do all this?

As I was thinking about travel to other countries - my short term to the DR and Haiti, and my year in Costa Rica - I started trying to figure out how much I could do to help the people, and how great it would be that I would be there to serve them, and how awesome the opportunity is that I get to tell them about Jesus... Now, although none of those things are bad, I started to realize how much I said I. Why is it so great that I get to go? I mean, they were just fine without my service right? and these people have lives that they'll go back to when I leave... so what kind of impact am I thinking that I can make? I mean really, I'm just one small human with limited strength anyway. So now what? What should my goal be... because obviously I've got something wrong. This is when I started thinking God. It hit me that HE chose me, HE saved me, HE provided the way for me to go, HE sent me, and HE got me here. So instead of focusing on what I could do, my thoughts took a different turn. How much can God do through me? Well, I've heard it many times "God can only work with what you give him." Ok so now I have to give to God enough of myself to be able to impact these people. Hmm.. If I want my impact to be great, I need to offer the most possible, aka my ENTIRE self. All of me should be God's, so that he can use it however he wants while I'm here. These people don't need me. They need God. So if I give my whole self to God then I guess they're getting God through me. That sounds like a better plan than what I had originally had in mind! And by stepping aside and letting God use me, I can now do more than what my poor human self could do on its own. Changing lives is a God thing. So as I give myself to him, he can change lives with my life, but he'll also change the life that I gave him (that would be mine). Wow. That sounds like a two-for-one deal to me!! So as I think of missions or service in God's name or all of this that I plan to do with my life, I strive to remember the hand that guides me, remember the Spirit behind the words that flow out of my mouth, remember the heart that loves those kids climbing on me more than I do, and remember the strength that keeps me chasing that soccer ball for the nine hundred and ONEth time ;) I desire to open my heart to his word and his Spirit, so that he will mold my life and actions, as I follow him wherever he takes me, into the perfect tool for every situation I'm thrown into. God is great, and he reigns in Costa Rica just as he does in my life. I like to challenge you reading this with Psalm 136 because the repetition always reminds me that we as humans need things beat into our heads before we get it :P guess what? His love endures FOREVER!!!! And the whole reason I do all this is to share that love that endures forever with others everywhere, any time, and every day that I'm alive to do my Mighty Lord's work.